Socializing
I'm feeling depressed about Dutch's daycare situation. The teachers in her new room ("Juniors"!) seem awfully listless. They don't seem to be working very hard to help her engage with the other kids. She's had a rough month. She's only been in daycare 2 or 3 days each week for the last three weeks, so she hasn't had a chance to get in a groove, and we've been traveling and had a grandmother visit, plus the pottytraining, all of which means a lot of transitions and stress. It seems that she's been really whiny and tearful at daycare, and spends lots of time watching other kids, or being actually hostile to them, telling them to "go away". I feel so sad for her, and it's hard to say how much is just life, and how much the teachers could affect. They're both kind of reserved, and I think that a more proactive approach would help Dutch engage positively with the other kids. But I don't know what happens during the day. I also don't know that it won't be good for her, in the end, to have to do the work herself. Assuming she does, and doesn't spend the next year as a mini-hermit.
I also recognize that spending the day with eight 3-year-olds is a heroic endeavor, and if I was doing it, I'd be lying exhausted on the floor by lunchtime. Making sure that one whiny insomniac kid has a satisfying social life would certainly not be my priority, particularly if I was paid the standard wage for a daycare employee. What I'm facing is the deep dilemma of childcare - few of us can afford to pay the salary that a person should earn for nurturing and teaching a child, and so we get less than we want for our children.
I'm also struggling with the fact that the teachers aren't raving over my lovely child. She was much happier in the Toddlers room, in spite of being much older and bigger than the other kids, and the teachers loved her for being so cooperative and helpful (relative to the 19-month-olds, which is not a very high standard). In her new class, she's not winning any hearts. (Her 20-minute nap habit is not helping with this, since it cuts seriously into the teachers' precious downtime.) It's not easy realizing that other people don't like your wonderful kid as much as you do. I am keenly aware of most of the things about her that are not very attractive, but I'm still shocked that the rest of the world doesn't think she's fabulous.
I also recognize that spending the day with eight 3-year-olds is a heroic endeavor, and if I was doing it, I'd be lying exhausted on the floor by lunchtime. Making sure that one whiny insomniac kid has a satisfying social life would certainly not be my priority, particularly if I was paid the standard wage for a daycare employee. What I'm facing is the deep dilemma of childcare - few of us can afford to pay the salary that a person should earn for nurturing and teaching a child, and so we get less than we want for our children.
I'm also struggling with the fact that the teachers aren't raving over my lovely child. She was much happier in the Toddlers room, in spite of being much older and bigger than the other kids, and the teachers loved her for being so cooperative and helpful (relative to the 19-month-olds, which is not a very high standard). In her new class, she's not winning any hearts. (Her 20-minute nap habit is not helping with this, since it cuts seriously into the teachers' precious downtime.) It's not easy realizing that other people don't like your wonderful kid as much as you do. I am keenly aware of most of the things about her that are not very attractive, but I'm still shocked that the rest of the world doesn't think she's fabulous.
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